Personal interaction with your newborn is the best toy ever. Show your happiness when handling your baby and smile at her. Look deep into her eyes and watch how she stares back. Soon, your baby will stop crying if held and comforted, and she will smile when she sees you. Let’s take a look at more specific ideas for encouraging your baby’s attachment to you.

Face-to-face contact. As a newborn, your baby will gaze at faces, especially at the eyes and mouth. She can see clearly eight to 12 inches away, about the space between her face and yours while feeding. Stick out your tongue, and your baby just might stick hers out, too! Position yourself close enough when singing or talking to your baby. It will seem like she is examining every part of your face-every nook and cranny-which is exactly what she is doing. Repetition will make baby remember who Mommy is and that she is the sure thing in her life.

Sucking. This natural reflex provides your baby with great comfort and satisfaction. Her sucking will become better and voluntary a few weeks after she is born. Allow her to use her thumb, fist, or pacifier to meet the natural need for sucking. Babies are born naturally knowing how to get nutrition through the sucking reflex. At first, this is an involuntary action. Soon, however, your baby will make the connection that sucking is pleasurable and provides feelings of security.  

Tummy time. Lay your baby on her tummy on a soft blanket. Put one or two colorful toys in front of her or around her in a circle. Allow her to practice movements for very short periods of time at first. One minute of tummy time three times a day is a good goal for a newborn. As weeks pass, you’ll pick up on her cues that tummy time can last longer. Rub her back, talk to her, and rattle a toy. If she’s not a big fan of tummy time, put a firm pillow or Boppy under her chest with her arms out in front of her so she can see what’s going on.  

Massage. Babies need to be touched, caressed and held. Loving touches nourish your baby’s emotional development and improve her sensory awareness. They stimulate the production of her growth and digestive hormones. Skin-to-skin contact is also soothing and comforting. It reduces stress and helps your baby to sleep. Massage your baby a few times a day. Work it into your routine, maybe after her morning bath or before a nap and in the evening just before bedtime.  

Singing. Babies love to be rocked and sung to. Nursery rhymes are fun for baby, too. At playtime, sing in a silly, happy voice with lots of laughter and tickling of toes. At bedtime, hold your swaddled baby gently in your arms while you feed her and sing in a soft, sweet voice. 

Swaddling. Most likely, the nurses had your baby tightly wrapped up like a little burrito during her hospital stay. Swaddling is soothing, warm, and calming. It also helps confine your baby’s limbs, keeping the Moro reflex at bay, which causes her to startle and throw her limbs out, often waking her up. Swaddling also mimics the cozy feeling of being in the womb and reduces the symptoms of colic.  

Holding baby close. A sling allows your baby to fold up as she were in utero, which feels good to your baby for several weeks after birth. In a sling or front pack, your baby will get to know your smell, voice, and movements. She will feel your hand patting or rubbing her. You can pick up on her cues more quickly, too. Imagine how much faster you’ll sense a dirty diaper if your baby is next to you rather than across the room or in a stroller!

Adapted from Boosting Your Baby’s Brain Power, by Holly Engel-Smothers and Susan M. Heim, ©2008.